We’ve all been there. Having a casual conversation with a colleague of a different ethnicity when suddenly that awkward silence hits where opinions about ethnicity rise to the surface. On occasion, if it’s a trusted colleague, we will engage carefully. Generally, we avoid these conversations to prevent conflict. We change the subject or excuse ourselves. At the end of the encounter, no one is enlightened. We are left to our unconscious biases and beliefs. In today’s workplace, where we seek to embrace diversity and inclusion in the tech industry, particularly through CompTIA’s Advancing Diversity in Technology (ADIT) Community, productive conversations about ethnicity and culture are imperative to better working relationships, team productivity and organizational goals.
There are many reasons we choose to avoid conversations about ethnicity in the workplace. Traditionally, in corporate America, ethnicity is a taboo subject that we must tip-toe around so as not to offend others. In my experience, I find that individuals fear unintentionally saying something offensive, which results in others feeling their opinions and ideas are being ignored. There are many of us who wish we knew how to broach the topic of ethnicity without fear and repercussions. Like any other skill, we can learn to talk about ethnicity in the workplace.
Before diving in, it’s a good idea to be clear about what you want to accomplish. Are you seeking to educate or inform the other person on a particular point of view? Do you desire to learn something about the other person? Are you trying to manage a problem between you and your colleague? Being clear with yourself and the other person can guide the conversation.
Be open to learning about your colleague’s point of view. Put aside your preconceptions and be respectful of differing perspectives. The goal of the dialogue is not about winning a debate. It’s about seeing from a different perspective, enhancing your own and reaching a shared understanding. Active listening is an essential component of every successful dialogue; especially those that are difficult or emotionally charged. Avoid the trap of us versus them by using inclusive language like “we” as opposed to “you”
Difficult conversations often trigger strong emotions and that’s okay. It’s normal. Be prepared to manage your emotional response. Acknowledge the trigger and hang in there even when it’s hard to listen to. This is often where the learning takes place. Notice that your colleague is probably experiencing a completely different emotion and your role is to allow them to express and reflect on the emotion without fear of backlash. Remember, your colleague’s perception is based on his/her personal reality – as are yours – and can’t possibly provide a complete view of complex ethnicity issues.
If you’re still with me, I’m not suggesting that this is easy, only that it’s possible. We don’t know what we don’t know. This is an ongoing journey to new knowledge about others and ourselves and embracing the discomfort in not having all the answers. My hope is that you challenge your lifelong and acquired beliefs against new ideas and knowledge and commit yourself to having dialogues with an open mind and without judgment. We need to have a productive conversation for change to happen. In the process, we become more effective leaders, team members, teachers and students.
Click here to get involved in CompTIA’s Advancing Diversity in Technology Community.
Yvette Steele is senior manager, communities, industry relations, CompTIA.
